Monday, February 9, 2015

10 Things I have Learned


I have been back to work full time outside the home for exactly two months now and I have learned a few things about myself in the working world.

I have learned-

That it takes roughly one week for a home with kids to revert back to a shithole once there is no one to do daily housekeeping.

I have ZERO tolerance for yoga pants in the workplace, UNLESS you're a fitness instructor.
Business Casual my ass.  Don't get me started on the half a skirt that makes a weekly appearance. I'm pretty sure you can see cooch.

People fart on the crowded bus and it's disgusting. (I know who you are buddy, don't think I don't. we're ALL onto you and you are foul. You may want to get in to see a Dr.)

I have OCD when it comes to unmade beds

I detest walking in crowds and silently resent getting caught behind slow walkers who are physically capable of keeping pace. (Usually males walking in groups-frustration level just above "Manspreading" google it, it's a real thing and two frustration levels below walking "hand holders".)

Photocopiers and I have a love hate relationship. mostly hate.

The coffee shop is 15 floors away. Too far for my liking.

Taking public transit is good for the environment and also good for developing my surfing skills.

Lots of people smoke Weed and then immediately take transit. (see farting guy)
it must help with the motion sickness, maybe I should give it a go.

No one in my family is worse for wear and all settled right back into the routine of up early, home late, rushing here, rushing there- although, dinner leaves a lot to desired most nights but reintroduction of vegetables should be virtually painless.  Now if the Barbies and dirty socks would stop procreating all over the house and the beds would "automake" I'd be "having it all".

On a positive note, I am falling back in love with my City and it's downtown. The Man who hands me my newspaper every morning makes me smile and wishes me a good day-even under his scarf his eyes tell me he's smiling. The fellow 15 floors down where I get my coffee is kind and likes to chat, makes a mean egg sandwich and an excellent cup of hot coffee.


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